Douchey come and Douchey go
what does Douchey want? only Douchey knows
Douchey done like he did before I was Douchey once but I ain’t no more
I was seventeen when I first believed I was young and strong, I was sad and mean
and it was ten long years learning how to breathe
in a bubble buried six feet deep
only twenty-one, I was dead and gone up and hung my head from the highest rung
and it’s a long way down from all Kingdom Come
to a mop and broom and a staple gun
NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Oh when I was just a little boy, my daddy sat me down
said “my son, you are a Douchey, Douchey won’t you do me proud?” so I shunned the foolishnesses of the other kids at play scuttled off my youthfulness and I just set out on my way down the straight and narrow highway headed right into the sun and when I got to New York City all the zeroes turned to ones and I was wandering the sidewalk telling strangers where to go I was singing like a savior in a manger all alone ’til I made myself a martyr and nobody seemed to mind broke a window with my buttocks but my buttocks were just fine ’til I woke up in a forest with my fingers turning blue and started serving ice cream sandwiches to men in business suits took a look into the mirror, said “OH GOD, what can I do to feel like a human being and not a DOUCHE?”
Introspective pop songs with transcendent melodies offer a joyful meditation on staying present in a world that often moves too fast. Bandcamp New & Notable Mar 16, 2023